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NFL Playoffs: Choose Your Own Adventure

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Do you want your postseason rooting experience to be over as soon as possible?

HOUSTON TEXANS

Yes!

Then get psyched for Andy Reid in the playoffs.

KANSAS CITY CHIEFS

GREEN BAY PACKERS

NEW YORK GIANTS

DALLAS COWBOYS

PITTSBURGH STEELERS

Yes, I want to be free an hour into wild-card weekend.

And do you still trust leaders to accomplish things they have previously failed to do in every circumstance?

Hell, no, and that's why I voted for ...

I root only for the most proven winners.

You like the Yankees, don't you?

Yes, Mike Francesa is my role model!

Love 'em. And I hope to visit New York one day.

Yes

No

Do you miss the Bengals' guaranteed opening-weekend flop?

No

Yes, my name is Marvin Lewis.

Has your ideal team failed to defeat a playoff-bound squad all year?

No, isn't it the playoffs?

Yes

It is. But what year is it?

Do you think it's the college playoffs?

2017

1977

Hell, yeah, SEC!

Uh, it's basically 2014, right?

It really isn't. But good luck thinking it is.

No

If you were to give an insufferable soliloquy about your culture of excellence, and then were told to shut up, would you call your counterpart a jagoff?

No

But would you drop your R's?

Of cawse.

Come on. Don't do this.

It's yo-ah flow chaht!

Fine, go root for the Patriots. Cheater.

The hell did you say to me?

MIAMI DOLPHINS

DETROIT LIONS

ATLANTA FALCONS

OAKLAND RAIDERS

SEATTLE SEAHAWKS

NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS