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Yummy. Ellie Brown, wife of John Y. Brown Jr.—the president of Kentucky Fried Chicken—was named chairman of the board of the Kentucky Colonels, of which Mr. Brown is also part owner. Mrs. Brown immediately picked an all-woman board of directors. "I don't know much about basketball," said Mrs. Brown from the head of the table, "but John didn't know much about fried chicken when he started, either." The other board members are Billie Clair Kurfees, Faith Lyles, Mary Baird, Patsy Baker and Sissy Jenkins. They were selected, Mrs. Brown said, "because each has been elected president of her woman's organization...and because John likes them all." The Kentucky top brass is now being referred to around Louisville as the Chicken Colonels.

When Lou Holtz arrived at North Carolina State he took over a football team that had a 3-8 record in 1971, and went 8-3-1. So what does the newly crowned Coach of the Year of the Atlantic Coast Conference do on his vacation to celebrate? He goes to Liverpool, Ohio and runs the Mini-Mart grocery store for his in-laws so they can take a vacation. "I didn't leave the store for seven days," says Holtz. "Some of the fans wanted to talk football, but I had a job to do; I sold them groceries from 7 a.m. to 11 p.m. Three nights I accidentally set off the burglar alarm. Then the plumbing broke but my wife fixed it. We had a littering problem in the parking lot but I got my kids to clean it up. My biggest complaint was eating nothing but sandwiches all that time. Next year I'm taking my grill and cooking steak in the parking lot." Holtz says he is extremely happy to be back coaching football.

Bill Lamebull, a Southern Cheyenne Indian and a University of Oklahoma sophomore, has received unpleasant threats. Certain persons object to his dressing up in Indian costume and acting as Oklahoma yell-leader at football games this fall. "Several Indians on and off campus have told me that if I show up at Owen Field, I'd better be ready to pay for it," Lamebull says. "I don't think that what I do is a sellout. I believe we can be proud that an Indian heads up the student body at football games."

There is already a small but growing body of statistics connected with David Clyde, the 18-year-old left-handed wunderkind of the Texas Rangers. Most of them demonstrate what he has accomplished on the mound, at the gate, and so forth. But his most impressive showing may have concerned a restaurant located near Arlington Stadium. On the night of Clyde's second start in the big leagues, the restaurant sold 800 pounds of barbecued spareribs, which is exactly 40% of a ton and twice as much as the 400 pounds of good eating sold on an ordinary night.

If it moves, it's worth stealing...or so it sometimes seems nowadays. Nancy Leahy, a former Canadian national champion, was attending church before leaving for this year's kayaking championship. When she entered the church, her $550 Olympic kayak was firmly tied to the top of her car. When she came out, the kayak was gone, and so was her chance to compete.

Generally a vehement proponent of gun control, Indiana Senator Birch Bayh made a bang with Hoosier muzzle-loaders last weekend. Having decided that antique weapons were all right, he competed in the 50-yard bench gun event at the Marion County Fish and Game Association Shoot. The Senator placed second with 49 out of a possible 50 points. And although he sponsors a bill that would outlaw small handguns, Bayh is proposing legislation that would exempt the black powder used for antique weapons from federal restrictions. On this issue, he will be muzzled.

Ex-quarterback, current clothes-horse, Cosell-teasing telecaster Don Meredith appeared in a serious new role—lecturer in a University of the Pacific 10-day course titled "Instant Replay: An Investigation Into Sport in Our Society." Invited to the university by Professor Lawrence Meredith—no relation—Dandy Don got no pay and picked up his own expenses. "I am concerned," he told his class, "that the joy of motor movement, body movement, in play and sport has diminished in favor of sitting and watching. I am concerned that a form of monopolistic capitalism has dominated sport. I am concerned about the TV industry's impact. Some of it is frightening. It's a minor shock to listen to Bill Bradley in a New York Knicks team film as the camera pans to the crowd's expressions while he wonders if his real role is to provide an opiate for them." Meredith also foresaw a major athletic event on prime time TV every night of the week and noted, "I'm not sure if it's good or bad." Except on Mondays, of course.

Karl Noonan, 29, one of three original Miami Dolphins left on the NFL championship team, has retired, partly because he could make twice as much money at his other job, which is selling industrial real estate. "Football has become a hobby, an expensive hobby that interferes with my business," he said.

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