SCORECARD

BOOTED

Woody Hayes' 28-year career at Ohio State came to a sudden end last week when he went berserk toward the end of the Gator Bowl game in Jacksonville. With Clemson leading 17-15 and 1:59 remaining, Ohio State had a third down and five to go on the Clemson 24. But that's as far as the Buckeyes got. Clemson Middle Guard Charlie Bauman intercepted an Art Schlichter pass. When Bauman was tackled near the Ohio State bench, Hayes went wild. He grabbed Bauman and punched him. When one of his own players, Ken Fritz, attempted to intervene, Hayes turned on him. There was a mob scene of milling players and coaches. Finally Hayes was wrestled away by his defensive coach, George Hill. Ohio State drew a 15-yard penalty for Hayes' unsportsmanlike conduct. Then Ohio State was penalized another 15 yards when the still-raging Hayes ran onto the field and had to be led away by an assistant.

Ohio State Athletic Director Hugh Hindman, who had played for Hayes at Miami University in 1949 and served as one of his assistants at Ohio State for seven years, confronted Hayes privately in the locker room. Hindman told Hayes he was going to inform the Ohio State president, who was in the stands, of the particulars of the affray, and that Hayes "could expect the worst possible result." There was a bitter exchange between the two men, and then, Hindman says, Hayes "asked if he had the opportunity to resign, and I told him he did. Shortly thereafter he said, 'I'm not going to resign. That would make it too easy for you. You had better go ahead and fire me.' "

With that, Hindman drove off to see Ohio State President Harold L. Enarson at the country club in Ponte Vedra where he was staying. They met shortly after two in the morning, and Hindman told Enarson, who had no clear idea of what had happened on the field, about Hayes. They agreed to fire him. "There isn't a university or an athletic conference in the country which would permit a coach to physically assault a college athlete," Enarson says. At 8 a.m. Hindman told Hayes he was through as coach. After returning to Columbus, Hayes cleared out his office of his few personal possessions, including his books on Emerson, great generals and wars, loaded them into his Bronco and went home to seclusion.

It is surprising that Hayes was not canned years ago. In addition to numerous publicized outbursts of temper and violence, Hayes often flew into ungovernable rages in practice and struck his players. There was talk last year that Ohio State wanted to fire Hayes after he punched an ABC cameraman in the stomach, but it was just talk; the only punishment meted out to Hayes was a year's "probation" by the Big Ten.

One of the problems with big-time college football is the reverence in which coaches are held. They are called Coach Jones and Coach Smith and Coach Hayes, investing them with almost priestly eminence and inviolability. It goes to the head, and Hayes isn't the only coach who regards himself as omnipotent and beyond criticism, and football as something separate from the university. One of the most telling insights into the relationship between football and higher education came last week from OSU President Enarson, who, when asked if the Hayes case were embarrassing to the university, remarked, "I take comfort with the keen awareness that football and the great reputation of this university tend to be totally separate."

Then there is the matter of ABC's coverage of the incident. Announcers Keith Jackson and Ara Parseghian professed to be confused about what was going on down on the field, even though the camera clearly showed Hayes punching Bauman. Were Jackson and Parseghian—or should it be Coach Parseghian?—attempting to draw a discreet shade over a member of the clan who had gone out of control? Or are they simply inept? Was Producer Bob Goodrich fearful of hurting the "image" of college football, which ABC televises during the season? Or is Goodrich simply inept? Whatever the reason, ABC booted the story the night Coach Hayes booted his career at Ohio State.

1,857'3½" AND ALL THAT

Attention, trivia nuts. Harvey Pollack, the PR director for the Philadelphia 76ers, who in our last issue revealed to an anxiously awaiting world all sorts of recondite statistics on technical fouls in the NBA, is at it again. To wit, these samples from the Sixers' media guide:

•If all 285 players who competed in the NBA last year were stacked on top of one another they would be 1,857'3½" high.

•More than 48% of all the games played in the 32 years the NBA has been in existence have ended with a victory margin of eight points or fewer. The most common margin is two, which has occurred 1,081 times.

•Thirty-five players on NBA rosters last season went to college in California. Of these, 31 played in the Pac-10, and of those, 13 played at UCLA, which provided more players than any other school in the nation. The runner-up, with eight, was North Carolina.

•An early lead is likely to mean victory. Last season the team that led after the first period went on to win the game 64.7% of the time. The halftime leader won 70.7% of the time, and the third-period leader 81.4%.

•The nicknames for Darryl Dawkins' dunk shots are: In Your Face Disgrace, Lefthanded Spine-Chiller Supreme, Sexophonic Turbo Delight, Earthquake Breaker, Flop-A-Dop, Look Out Below, Gorilla, Dunk You Very Much, Hammer of Thor, The One We Owe You and the No Playin Get Out of the Wayin Backboard Swayin Game Delayin.

NI KULTURNIY

Boris Alexandrov, star Soviet forward, has gotten the boot from the national ice hockey team and from Moscow's Central Army club, the Canadiens of Russia. The Communist youth newspaper Komsomolskaya Pravda reports that Alexandrov "arrived drunk for training" and was "guilty of physical aggression" on and off the ice. In short, he had become "too egotistical."

Privately, the Soviets say he was acting just like a North American pro.

HANDS OFF

Shoplifters are having tough sledding these days, thanks to increasing use of electronic systems that set off alarm bells. Particularly sporting shoplifters.

Oddly enough, stores selling sports apparel get ripped off more than other retail outlets. According to George Harbin, senior vice-president of Sensormatic Electronics in Deerfield Beach, Fla., the largest manufacturer of what they call electronic article surveillance equipment, sporting-goods stores lose 4% to 5% in sales a year because of shoplifting, as compared to 3% for other kinds of retail stores. "You're talking about a loss of $40,000 to $50,000 a year for a store that does $1 million in business," he says. "By installing an electronic system, a retailer can cut that 4%-to-5% loss to around 1%. A retailer can live with that because he figures he's going to make a 1% error in his stock anyway."

The Sensormatic system—which is utilized by such stores as Eastern Mountain Sports, Inc., Macy's, Korvettes, The May Company and Carson Pirie Scott & Co.—employs a small plastic tag containing a foil antenna and a diode about the size of a grain of pepper. The tag is affixed to articles with a stainless-steel tack that can only be removed by the retailer. When a shoplifter attempts to leave the store, an electronic sensor at the door activates an alarm.

"Interestingly, our system has proven conclusively that shoplifting is not a minority or a teen-age problem," says Harbin. "Electronics have no built-in bias, and results show that the profile of the average shoplifter is the profile of the average customer. One of our Midwestern customers found that his average shoplifter was white, female, 23 years old, had one child and a husband who made 15 grand a year, just the customer the retailer was aiming to attract."

A couple of weeks ago Killington Ski Area in Vermont installed its own super-sophisticated tagging system on skis racked outside the lodge. By using directional antennae and range finders, Killington was able to nail six suspected ski thieves, two of whom have already been convicted. Says Dave Langlois, special-projects coordinator, "We've cut our ski thefts to almost nothing."

MIXED MOTIVES

What makes hunters and anti-hunters tick? It all depends, says Dr. Stephen R. Kellert of Yale, who has been studying both for the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. According to his report, anti-hunters appear to be motivated by two somewhat different attitudes. There is what Kellert calls the humanistic anti-hunter who has a strong emotional identification with animals. "To most humanistic anti-hunters," Kellert writes, "it was inconceivable that anyone could find killing an animal an enjoyable activity. Sport hunting seemed a little like killing for killing's sake, a deliberate desire to inflict suffering and pain without cause or reason." Then there is the moralistic anti-hunter whose "objection to hunting was not based primarily on what it did to animals (or because of love for the animal) but for the presumably degenerative impact it had on the person and society."

Hunters themselves fall into three groups, says Kellert. He calls the largest group—43.8% of those who hunted in the past five years—Utilitarian/Meat Hunters. They are likely to come from a rural background and to have fathers in farm-related occupations. This group includes a disproportionate number of people over 65 and a significant number who earn less than $6,000 a year. Utilitarian/Meat Hunters value the hunted animal most as a source of food.

What Kellert calls the Dominionistic/Sport Hunters constitute 38.5% of all those who hunted in the last five years. They are likely to live in cities and to have served in the armed forces. Hunting seems to provide "an opportunity to engage in a sporting activity involving mastery, competition, display of shooting skill and expression of prowess."

The third group is made up of Nature Hunters, who comprise 17.7%. They come from a higher socioeconomic status and include more women than the other hunter groups. They had an interest in wildlife in childhood and know more about wildlife than other hunters. They have a "strong interest, concern and affection for all animals." They seek a "reaffirmation of basic relationships between humans and the natural world separated by contemporary society's barriers of civilized and industrial culture." Killing gives them "a greater awareness of life's transitory character, of the need to live one's ephemeral existence purposefully." As one Nature Hunter said, "It's death that makes the spark of life glow most brightly, measure for measure."

SUPER CHARGE

A crowd of 80,000 is expected at the Super Bowl, which will be held at the Orange Bowl in Miami on Jan. 21. Most of those who drive to the game are expecting to pay an arm for parking. But an arm and a leg?

There are fewer than 3,000 parking spaces on the grounds, and they're all accounted for at $4 each. This means that neighborhood homes and businesses are going to profit handsomely, and then some. According to a survey by Sports Editor John Crittenden of The Miami News, in order to park there a driver will have to pay up to $30, which matches the cost of a ticket to the game. The $30 charge was set by Renier Quevada, who runs a service station across the street from the north parking lot at the Orange Bowl. He charged $10 a car for the Dolphin-Oiler wild-card playoff game week before last, and he intended to charge $15 for the Oklahoma-Nebraska Orange Bowl game last Monday night. That was more than the price of a ticket: $12.50. Does Quevada have any qualms about charging $30 for the Super Bowl? "I'll be sold out 30 minutes before game time," he says.

ILLUSTRATION

THEY SAID IT

•Denny Crum, Louisville basketball coach, on his contract: "I'm getting $300,000, but over a 150-year period."

•Darrell Hedric, Miami of Ohio basketball coach, after his team lost to Purdue 76-57: "If you want to know the turning point, it was our layup drill."