BACKSPIN ANOTHER TAKE ON THE HEADLINES

SHARK OPENING GREG NORMAN'S DOWN UNDER RESTAURANTS

We wish him well, but wonder how long it'll be before they're
called Greg Norman's Went Under.

THE FUSS OVER FURYK'S SWING

Everyone is saying how strange Jim's action is, as if any Tour
pro's swing is the norm.

U.S. PLAYERS SELECTED FOR ANDERSEN CHAMPIONSHIP

Pavin and Stricker are in, while Duval and Woods are out?
Tournament officials must've made their picks off a missing-persons report.

WOOSNAM SAYS HE'LL JOIN PGA TOUR

Little Woosie's stated reason: He's tired of his low ranking.
The real reason: He has already hit every pub in Europe.

DALY'S NO. 1 IN DRIVING DISTANCE

But 145th in driving accuracy, so we can call him Long and Wrong
John.

MONTY ENDS EXERCISE PROGRAM

Instead of running to the fridge, Montgomerie (below) will walk.

COLOR PHOTO: JIM GUND [Colin Montgomerie]