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Original Issue

For The Record

BOUGHT By Cubs first baseman Randall Simon, Italian sausages for
the 330 fans sitting in section 112--behind first base--at
Milwaukee's Miller Park at last Saturday's Cubs-Brewers game.
Simon was making amends for the July 8 incident when, as a
Pirate, he lightly struck a costumed Brewers employee with his
bat as she ran in one of Milwaukee's famous sausage races. Mandy
Block, 19, fell but suffered only scrapes on her hands and knees.
Although Simon apologized and paid a $432 fine for disorderly
conduct, he was booed upon his return to the stadium. He spent
more than $1,100 on the sausages, which were distributed during
that night's race (which went off without Block, who's gone back
to college). "I think it got me closer to the fans," he said of
the meaty gesture. "I wanted the fans here to know that I don't
have anything against Milwaukee."

DECLINED By Michael Jordan, an offer from Charlotte Bobcats owner
Robert Johnson to take any position he wanted with the NBA
expansion team. Johnson courted Jordan all summer, but in the end
Jordan, who tried to buy the Bucks earlier this year, decided the
job he wanted was Johnson's. "His goal is to be a majority owner
of an NBA franchise, and we wish him the best in that pursuit,"
said Johnson.

RETURNED To competition, the Iraqi national soccer team, on a
tour put together by its German coach, Bernd Stange. After
reorganizing in July and defeating Iran in Tehran 1-0, Iraq came
to Germany, where it has played two second-division clubs,
defeating Unterhaching 4-1 last week and playing Energie Cottbus
to a 0-0 tie on Sunday. The Iraqi players--many of whom had
endured beatings and imprisonment by order of Saddam Hussein's
son Uday--are preparing for the start of World Cup 2006
qualifying later this year but must do much of their work on the
road. "Soccer in Baghdad is impossible," Stange told reporters in
Germany. "The main stadium is destroyed, and the field is now a
car park for American tanks."

DUPED Into holding a 12-minute phone conversation with a man he
thought was Canadian prime minister Jean Chretien, baseball
commissioner Bud Selig. Marc-Antoine Audette of the Montreal
comedy team Les Justiciers Masques talked to Selig about the
future of the Expos. The commissioner told him that saving the
team was "mission impossible" and that the actions of the team's
former owners were "appalling." Selig added, "You know, I wish
we'd had this conversation a few years ago." The exchange was
replayed on Montreal radio. In August, Audette similarly duped
Formula One boss Bernie Ecclestone, who asked "Mr. Chretien" to
relax Canada's tobacco advertising regulations to help save the
Canadian Grand Prix.

Filed For divorce, Lance and Kristin Armstrong, who have been
married for five years and who separated last January, then
reconciled two months later. The Armstrongs and their three
children were together this summer when Lance won his fifth Tour
de France and the family celebrated at the finish line. They had
planned to spend the rest of the summer in Spain but returned to
Texas early. "We're doing this peacefully," Lance said. "The
craziest thing is, we're closer now and better friends than ever
before. We're truly committed to maintaining a good relationship,
but not a marriage."

ALLEGED By author Gerald Posner, that Prince Ahmed bin Salmon of
Saudi Arabia, who owned 2002 Kentucky Derby winner War Emblem,
had knowledge of the Sept. 11 attacks before they were carried
out. In Why America Slept: The Reasons Behind Our Failure to
Prevent 9/11, Posner, who has written highly regarded books on
the John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr. assassinations,
cites unnamed sources implicating Ahmed in an arrangement that
had Saudi princes paying Osama bin Laden not to stir up dissent
in their country. Ahmed, who died in July 2002, reportedly of a
heart attack, bought War Emblem for $900,000 three weeks before
the Derby.

RETIRED After 15 seasons as a Ranger, goalie Mike Richter, who in
1994 led the team to its first Stanley Cup in 54 years, ending
the longest title drought in NHL history. Richter, 36, went
301-258-73, making him the winningest goalie in the Rangers' 77
years. He hasn't played since last Nov. 5, when he sustained a
concussion after being inadvertently kneed in the head by the
Oilers' Todd Marchant. He'd also suffered a concussion nine
months earlier and is feeling lingering effects. "I knew this day
would come, but my script never included having it end from an
injury," Richter said at a tearful announcement last week. "It's
like the death of a close friend." A three-time NHL All-Star,
Richter played on the gold-medal-winning U.S. World Cup team in
1996 and helped the U.S. win silver at the 2002 Olympics, where
he was named to the All-Tournament team. Richter's stop of a
penalty shot by Canucks sniper Pavel Bure in Game 4 of the 1994
finals is arguably the most important save ever for the Rangers,
who will retire his number later this season.

RETIRED After 19 seasons with six teams, 37-year-old forward Kirk
Muller, who began his NHL career as a dynamic scorer for the
Devils and ended it as a hard-nosed checker who helped define the
Stars' gritty style. "Right into my 19th year, I was still
learning lots about the game," said the six-foot, 205-pound
Muller last week. Selected second overall by the Devils in the
1984 draft--right after Mario Lemieux--Muller proved a determined
leader who in '87 was named captain at age 21, then the youngest
captain in NHL history. Captain Kirk, as he was known, was traded
to the Canadiens in '91 and led Montreal to the '93 Stanley Cup
with 17 points in 20 playoff games. After playing for the
Islanders, the Maple Leafs and the Panthers, Muller signed with
the Stars in '99 and helped them to the 2000 finals. The six-time
All-Star had 357 career goals and 602 assists in 1,349 games.