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Original Issue

The Show

Uh-oh, now it's serious. Philip Rivers's agent just cut off talks with all fantasy leagues.

NBC OLYMPIC RATINGS SLIGHTLY AHEAD OF SYDNEY'S Don't get excited. Those figures may not count because Bob Costas was seen doing an illegal dolphin kick under his desk.

The Peacock Network has gone a little nuts hyping the Games on all its outlets. Tomorrow night John McEnroe interviews Rulon Gardner's amputated toe.

So far there have been no disruptions in Athens, although a hotel housing IOC sponsors was evacuated. I believe the sponsors were staying in the Bribal Suite.

The Dream Team is staying aboard the Queen Mary 2. After the loss to Lithuania the USOC switched the act in the lounge from Jay-Z to Billy Ray Cyrus.

Officials are letting spectators move to better sections at half-empty venues. But it's getting out of hand. A Long Island dentist slipped Larry Brown $20 and got to trade seats with Carmelo Anthony.

CARLY PATTERSON VAULTS TO GOLD MEDAL IN ALL-AROUND Don't worry about Svetlana Khorkina. Next month she'll be presented with a special Tony for Best Dramatic Revival.

Classy move by Michael Phelps. After he won his fifth gold medal, Phelps gave his spot on the relay to Ian Crocker. But that was only after he'd been turned down by Marion Jones and the Korean gymnast.

Just wondering. Would it besmirch the Olympic ideal if during the track and field medal ceremonies, instead of the national anthem they played the theme from Jeopardy! while we wait for test results?

MLB OWNERS GIVE BUD SELIG THREE-YEAR EXTENSION Help me out here. Is that a three-year extension on his contract, or to make a decision about the Expos?

White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen missed a game after being hospitalized with a kidney stone. Of course, he's claiming Hunter Wendelstedt told him the stone was out.

Elsewhere Phil Nevin was reprimanded by Padres management for criticizing new Petco Park. His biggest complaint about Petco: the way the fans start barking every time they hear an electric can opener.

"PRIME TIME" RERUN FOR RAVENS? Ray Lewis and Corey Fuller are trying to talk Deion Sanders into coming out of retirement and playing nickelback in Baltimore. Deion hasn't played in three years. Which means he hasn't made an open-field tackle in almost five.

Ravens RB Jamal Lewis's drug-conspiracy trial is scheduled to begin on Nov. 1, Week 8 of the season. However, he has to be down to his 26man defense team by Week 4.

TIGER UN-CINKABLE AT WGC-NEC Despite finishing second at Firestone, Woods retained the No. 1 ranking. Vijay Singh needed to finish ahead of Tiger in the tourney. And stick his dismount.

JEREMY ROENICK ADMITS SHELLING OUT $100,000 FOR GAMBLING TIPS I don't know how good the tips were. One was to take the Jets plus 1 1/2 goals.

One hundred thousand dollars in tips and no lap dances? Somebody call the Better Business Bureau.

ESPN AND ESPN2 AIRING 25 LITTLE LEAGUE WORLD SERIES GAMES This is smart. If a game is a blowout, they'll cut away to six guys playing no-limit hold 'em at the Williamsport Radisson.

IRAQI SOCCER FOOTAGE USED IN BUSH CAMPAIGN ADS The Iraqis aren't thrilled, especially when a referee hits John Kerry with a red card.

My time is up. You've been great. Enjoy Bananarama.

Bill Scheft will be at the Hall of Fame celebration of Jewish baseball players next week, running the Richie Scheinblum memorabilia booth.