The Beat

The"house" part is unlikely, but is Eva Longoria about to become a wife?During an appearance on The Ellen Degeneres Show last week Jamie Foxx referredto Spurs guard Tony Parker as Longoria's "boyfriend and soon-to-behusband," sending ripples through the gossip industry. Foxx was in the pastlinked romantically with Longoria, but he and Parker are far from rivals. Thetwo plan to work together on a rap song for Parker's debut album, which will berecorded partly en Français. (Parker grew up in France.) Said Foxx of hiscollaborator's French flow, "It's sexy. I don't know what he's saying. Hecould just be saying, 'Order me dinner.' It's a trip to hear it."

•There are twopeople Matt Leinart won't be bringing to the NFL draft on April 29 in New YorkCity. The USC quarterback fired his agent, Leigh Steinberg, just two weeksbefore the big day (he replaced him with Tom Condon), and now his friends sayhe has split with Brynn Cameron (right), his girlfriend of a year. A rep forLeinart declined to comment. Cameron, a guard on the USC basketball team, willbe a junior next season.

•If Tommy Lasordacan have his own blog, then why can't Abner Doubleday? Well, he's been dead for113 years. Enter writer Paul Davidson, who imagined e-ramblings from 175 latehistorical figures--including Wilt Chamberlain and Babe Ruth--in The LostBlogs: From Jesus to Jim Morrison. (The book hits shelves on May 8.) Among therevelations in Davidson's faux musings: Chamberlain met his 14,373rd girlfriendwhile in line for a hot dog, and the man credited with inventing baseball foundit utterly boring. When it comes to watching a game, writes Davidson asDoubleday, "I would rather get shot in the neck with a bullet. And I was,during the Battle of Gettysburg."

•Further proofthat Hollywood loves an underdog: Last month Tim (Pops) Frisby, the retiredArmy Ranger who enrolled at South Carolina at age 39 in 2004 and played widereceiver for Steve Spurrier's Gamecocks, sold the rights to his story to aWarner Bros. executive. And autistic high school basketball manager Jason(J-Mac) McElwain, who scored 20 points in four minutes during a February game,sold his story to Columbia Pictures, where Magic Johnson will be executiveproducer. Said Johnson, "When we go to the movies, this is the type ofstory we want to see."

•Does having twoOlympic medals automatically make you Big Man on Campus? Joey Cheek, who wonspeedskating gold and silver in Turin, will find out soon enough. The26-year-old is planning to enroll in college this fall--at Princeton, Stanfordor Yale, he says--and MTV will document his exploits on Joey Cheek Goes toCollege, which premieres on mtvU on May 1. The network also went on ahumanitarian trip to Zambia with Cheek, who says his show will be more seriousthan, say, Newlyweds. "Those shows are fun to watch," says Cheek,"but there's more to me than sitting around swearing and gettingwasted." Wherever he enrolls, he's already pinned down a major."Economics," he says. "Nothing says TV ratings likeeconomics."

PICTURE THIS

It wasn't a house party so much as it was a Houseparty. Before the first game of the Suns-Lakers Western Conference playoffseries on Sunday in Phoenix, guard Eddie House, who grew up in Berkeley,Calif., entertained his teammates with a little old-school break dancing. Afterthe tip-off House showed he was capable of busting some decent moves whilevertical as well: He had four points in nine minutes in the Suns' 107--102win.

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE
Rangers outfielder Kevin Mench missed five games because he'd worn shoes thatwere too small.

They Said It

OZZIE GUILLEN
White Sox manager, on 270-pound closer Bobby Jenks (below): "When you getguys out, you're big. When you don't get guys out, you're fat."

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ROB SCHUMACHER/THE ARIZONA REPUBLIC (PICTURE THIS)

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ANDY ALTENBURGER/ICON SMI (JENKS)

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DARRYL DENNIS/ICON SMI (CAMERON)