The Beat

BEING DUMPED isnever fun, but Tony Romo seems to have landed on his feet after his girlfriendgave him the heave-ho three weeks ago. Two days later Romo replaced DrewBledsoe as the Cowboys' starting quarterback (page 76), and last week there wasword that he already has a new girlfriend—Dallas native Jessica Simpson(below). Romo has declined to comment, but he did dine with Simpson's fatherand manager, Joe, in Los Angeles earlier this month; he also treated Joe totickets for the Cowboys-Cardinals game on Nov. 12. Romo knows how to impress agirl's dad: He passed for 308 yards and two TDs in a 27--10 win.

• In relatednews, there are only two degrees of separation between Simpson and Derek Jeternow that Simpson's ex-husband, Nick Lachey, is dating MTV VJ Vanessa Minnillo,who recently broke up with Jeter after an on-and-off two-year romance. Jeterwasn't single for long. Last week the New York Post and the New York Daily Newsreported that the serial celebrity dater (he has been linked to Mariah Carey,Jordana Brewster and Jessica Alba) is an item with Jessica Biel, who was namedEsquire's Sexiest Woman Alive in 2005.

• If Grambling'splayers look funkier than usual when they face Southern University inSaturday's Bayou Classic, it's because they're wearing Big Boi. RussellAthletic, which makes Grambling's togs, commissioned the OutKast rapper to whipup a new jersey for the game. The result: a red, yellow and black ensemblethat, Big Boi says, is everything a uniform should be: "You wanna be like,bam, all in their mouth—and that's what these jerseys do." The Savannahnative now wants to redo the Atlanta Falcons' threads: "Maybe put featherson the sleeves. I wanna make 'em fly."

• When 2K Sportsreleased its NBA 2K7 game for PlayStation 2 in September, the feedback wasalmost unanimous: Clippers center Chris Kaman looks like a zombie. "Peoplewould write on Web boards, 'God, he looks awful,'" says 2K spokesmanAnthony Chau. So when the title was updated for the PS3 (released last Friday),producers de-zombified Kaman (page 54), softening his facial features. Othercomplaints were ignored. "Shaun Livingston wanted us to give him anAfro," says Chau, "and—as always—Shaq asked us to bump up histhree-point [shooting]." ... Sammy Sosa turned 38 on Nov. 12, and his partywas a home run. Actress Salma Hayek and Dominican president Leonel Fernàndezwere among the 700 at Sosa's $8 million home in La Romana, Dominican Republic.The former slugger, who didn't play this year, loves retirement. "If I hadknown my life would be this great," Sosa said, "I would have retiredthree years ago."

PICTURE THIS
This is why the Three Stooges never toured with the Harlem Globetrotters. WestFlorida forward Lucas Evangelista got an eyeful from Virginia Tech centerRobert Krabbendam when the Argonauts visited Blacksburg on Nov. 14. (No foulwas called.) West Florida lost 95--47, though it wasn't Evangelista's fault. Hewas a deadeye, leading the team with 11 points on 5-for-9 shooting.

 

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

A man in China has applied for a trademark to marketwomen's sanitary pads under the brand name Yao Ming.

They Said It

TEEMU SELANNE, Ducks winger, on hockey's popularity inAnaheim: "It's not like back home in Finland or even Canada, where girlswanted my leftover chicken bones from a meal I ate."

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CHRISTINIA O'CONNOR/THE ROANOKE TIMES/AP (PICTURE THIS)

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ROBERT LABERGE/GETTY IMAGES (SELANNE)

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FRANK MICELOTTA/FOX/GETTY IMAGES (SIMPSON)