A League of Their Own
PARIS HILTON
Asked her hidden talents, the heiress, who shares a birthday with MichaelJordan and Jim Brown (Feb. 17), replied, "Shopping, ice hockey andcooking." (She said she was on the ice hockey team in boarding school.)Also, she and Nicole Richie infuriated fans when they let their dog run looseon a minor league field on The Simple Life.
JOCK HOOKUPS
Linked with Matt Leinart (right), Brian Urlacher, former L.A. Kings centerJared Aulin and Avalanche goalie Jose Theodore (below).
EX BEHAVINGBADLY
Last July former beau Robert Mills, an Australian singer, was arrested duringthe World Cup for punching a cad who made what Mills called "filthy"comments about Paris outside a game in Munich. Said Paris, "That'ssweet." (The charge was dropped.)
THE PEOPLESPEAK
When she appeared on the Jumbotron at a Dodgers-Giants game in L.A. in April,she was booed so lustily she could have been Barry Bonds.
LINDSAY LOHAN
In school, the actress played soccer, basketball and lacrosse. In 2005's HerbieFully Loaded, La Lohan—who shares a birthday with Richard Petty (July 2)—didwhat Toyota has failed to do: She found success in NASCAR Nation in animport.
JOCK HOOKUPS
Was briefly linked with snowboarder Shaun White after the 2006 Olympics.Reportedly chatted up by Matt Leinart (right). Dated Calum Best, the son oflate soccer great George Best.
EX BEHAVINGBADLY
Former boyfriend Harry Morton—heir to the Hard Rock Café fortune and aspiringrestauranteur—ruffled feathers in Phoenix last year when he tried to buy thenaming rights to the Arizona Cardinals' new stadium. Morton wanted to name theplace after his chain of upscale Mexican joints: Pink Taco Stadium.
THE PEOPLESPEAK
Herbie Fully Loaded grossed $144 million worldwide.
BRITNEY SPEARS
Before turning to singing, Spears was a competitive gymnast in Louisiana. Shealso served as Grand Marshal of the 2001 Pepsi 400, where she wore a Knievelianjumpsuit and performed at halftime of Super Bowl XXXV.
JOCK HOOKUPS
Said she thought Luke Walton was cute; spotted with Matt Leinart (right).
EX BEHAVINGBADLY
Justin Timberlake ruined Super Bowl XXXVIII by de-bodicing Janet Jackson(below); shortly before they split, soon-to-be-ex-hubby Kevin Federline madeseveral appearances at WWE events—including one the night before she filed fordivorce.
THE PEOPLESPEAK
Her 2002 Super Bowl commercial for Pepsi was the game's most Tivo'd ad.However, when she offered to be in a commercial for the NFL Network in Januaryof 2007, league officials declined, with one network source saying she was"too much of a trainwreck."
I'll See You In Court
THE SPORTS world doesn't have a Bill of Rights toguarantee the right to bear tote bags and protect against cruel and unusualpunishment at the hands of mascots. But you wouldn't know that by looking atthe court dockets, which have been loaded of late with suits filed by litigiousfans, players and dinosaur. Herewith, SPORTS ILLUSTRATED's favorite sillysuits.
• In 1999 an Ottawa Senators season-ticket holderfiled a $27.5 million suit against holdout Alexei Yashin on the grounds thatthe value of tickets diminished when the captain held out for more money. Itwas thrown out of court.
• When he was traded to the Redskins in 2004, ClintonPortis offered new teammate Ifeanyi Ohalete $40,000—in three installments—forthe right to wear Ohalete's number 26. After Ohalete got cut, Portis stoppedthe payments. They settled: Ohalete got a total of $38,000.
• A male fan who was denied a red nylon tote bagduring a 2005 Mother's Day promotion at Angel Stadium sued the team for sex andage discrimination. The class-action suit argued that male fans and women underthe age of 18 were entitled to $4,000 in damages since only women 18 and overreceived the bags—which were worth $1.45 each. The court ruled for the Angels,but the next year on Mother's Day the team gave totes to all fans.
• Had the case made it to trial, it would have beenthe trial of the century. Or at least the furriest trial of the century. In1994 the Famous Chicken added a skit to his routine in which he acted out manya parent's fantasy—by pummeling Barney. The dinosaur's creators sued theChicken for $100,000 for each offense. Said a Barney flack, "[S]ome ofthose children become visibly upset when they see Barney beaten up." Barneytook another beating when the case was thrown out and his handlers had to paynearly $180,000 in court costs.
 
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BRANIMIR KVARTUC/AP (HILTON)
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RICHARD CARTWRIGHT/© 2005 DISNEY ENTERPRISES, INC./REUTERS (LOHAN)
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BOB ROSATO (SPEARS)
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MARK SULLIVAN/WIREIMAGE.COM (LEINART)
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PIERRE DUCHARME/REUTERS (TIMBERLAKE)
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LENNY IGNELZI/AP (CHICKEN)
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DAMIAN STROHMEYER (THEODORE)