Just My Type

The Interview
Travis Hafner
INDIANS DH

Hafner, training in Winter Haven, Fla., is, at 30, entering his seventh major league season.

Dan Patrick: When is the last time you thought about losing that 3--1 series lead to the Red Sox in the ALCS?

Travis Hafner: You think about it here and there, but the best thing to do is try to move on.

DP: What would make you think about it?

TH: You could see a TV commercial showing the Red Sox winning it.

DP: Strangest thing you've done as a DH between at bats.

TH: Probably check a fantasy football score online.

DP: Are you any good at fantasy football?

TH: Yeah, I've won our team league the last three years. My team name is Pronktably Unbeatable.

DP: How much privacy do you get when you take a drug test?

TH: None. The tester is there.

DP: How much conversation do you have with him?

TH: [Laughs.] I just try to get it done as quick as possible.

DP: So when you're having dinner with your wife, does she ever say, "How did the urine test go today?"

TH: [Laughs.] No, I don't think I'd want to have that conversation.

DP: You were the valedictorian of your high school....

TH: I just like to say I finished in the top 10 of my class. We had only eight people.

DP: If I went to your hometown of Sykeston, North Dakota, how long would it take for me to get into some trouble?

TH: I don't know if you can get into trouble, because we don't have a cop in the town.

DP: Could you buy your hometown? For $10 million, could you own Sykeston?

TH: Maybe I'm wrong, but I would guess you could do it for a million. It's not very big. I'd say it's less than a mile wide.

DP: Do you know who's on Mount Rushmore?

TH: Washington, Roosevelt ... is Lincoln?

DP: Abe is up there.

TH: Jefferson?

DP: Yes. Look at you, valedictorian.

TH: I just saw National Treasure 2, so that helped me.

THE FINE PRINT: Wladimir Klitschko won an easy decision over Sultan Ibragimov to unify the heavyweight title. Yeah, it was the unification of boredom and tedium.

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TWO PHOTOS

JOHN BIEVER (HAFNER)

ILLUSTRATION

ILLUSTRATION BY KEITH WITMER