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Detroit Jimmy Says ...

DAVID FEHERTY is back on the course after his run-in with a semi and so is his Five Questions segment, in which he queries golf people about the game. Sometimes it's good, but sometimes the questions sound as if they came from Paula Abdul. To mark Feherty's return, I thought it might be interesting if he quizzed his broadcast mates Jim Nantz (below) and Nick Faldo. Here's what I'd like to see him ask those guys.

Nantz:

1. You're boating with the Bushes in Kennebunkport. Bush 41 and your wife fall overboard at the same time. To whom do you throw the only life preserver?

2. What's Fred Couples's cellphone number?

3. Is it true you once said that you'd sell your soul to play like Gary McCord?

Faldo:

1. Paul Azinger says you punch like a girl. What about it?

2. What's more satisfying, getting into a green jacket or out of a bad relationship?

3. Quote from Woosie: "Nick couldn't peddle hookers on a troop train. I can't see how he's going to get these guys to play hard for him." Thoughts?

GOOD TOURNAMENT last week, but all the talk about the Colonial's Horrible Horseshoe (the 3rd, 4th and 5th holes) brought back the on-air conversation during the Players about the search for a moniker for the last three holes at the Stadium course. Jimmy Roberts weighed in with a Deane Beman suggestion: Run the Gantlet. I was thinking more along the lines of Whac-a-Mole or Arnie's Armpit. At any rate, leave the naming to the media, Deano. Labeling a particularly difficult series of holes is their job, always has been. The Players broadcast also brought us the worst caddie bibs in the world (left). Who designed those things? They looked like the maid's uniform at a sleazy hotel chain. Lastly, if this is the Tour's major, isn't it time we got a trophy commensurate with the gravitas of the event? That thing looks like a milk bottle. They're killing me.

Jim McGovern ran Buick's golf program from 1998 to 2005 and now consults for title sponsors of PGA Tour events.

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COURTESY OF JIM MCGOVERN (MCGOVERN)

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DAVID BERGMAN (NANTZ)

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ROBERT BECK (CADDIE)