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Party Animals

Cringe-worthy moments from victory parades

CHASE UTLEY is a feared hitter and a fine second baseman, but as the Phillies revel in their championship this off-season, he should think twice about accepting any appearance offers that involve live television. During Philadelphia's World Series rally last Friday, Utley (right) grabbed the mike and shouted to the crowd that the Phils were "world f------ champions!" Few Philadelphians seemed to mind the profane slip, and Utley said he didn't plan to swear. (He probably wasn't intending to work blue during this year's All-Star Home Run Derby, either, but when Yankee Stadium fans gave him a Bronx cheer, ESPN viewers heard Utley, who was wearing a microphone, say, "Boo? F--- you.") Embarrassing? Sure, but Utley isn't the first athlete to make a spectacle of himself at a championship celebration.

Pat Riley
After the Heat wins the 2006 NBA title, Shaquille O'Neal asks the throng in Miami, "Who wants to see Coach Riley dance?" The crowd cheers—presumably they had never before seen Coach Riley dance. Riley (left) shimmies and does his best white man's overbite. Perhaps not coincidentally, he undergoes hip surgery the next season.

Juan Pierre
At the Marlins' 2003 rally in Miami, the outfielder launches into a spirited but nearly incomprehensible rap about Florida's unlikely postseason run. Sample line: "We got them Cubs, and you know it's all about them loves." Pierre hasn't been on a championship team since—nor has he been invited to any parades.

Mark Madsen
The Lakers' benchwarmer takes to the mike in 2001 and asks, "Who let the dogs out?"—but that's not the embarrassing part. Later, with Shaquille O'Neal rapping, Madsen (right) either launches into arrhythmic dancing or has a seizure. The motion, in any case, becomes Madsen's trademark: He repeats it when L.A. wins another title in '02.

Nancy Kerrigan
During a 1994 parade at Disney World honoring her for winning an Olympic silver medal, the figure skater (left) is filmed by a TV station muttering, "This is so corny. This is so dumb. I hate it. This is the most corny thing I've ever done." The clip becomes front-page news, sealing Kerrigan's rep as an ice queen.

Dwight Gooden
The Mets ace is a no-show for the team's 1986 World Series ticker-tape parade in Manhattan. The Mets say he overslept, but Gooden (right) later admits that he was hung over from a previous, less-family-oriented, celebration.