The Strike Zone

Tracking the week's news both inside and outside the confines of cool

OUTSIDE

The abundance of news stories about Mark Cuban's uncharacteristic silence (he hasn't blogged since April 12!) during the NBA Finals.

Tim Tebow's new autobio, Through My Eyes, gets blurbed by Chuck Norris and imagines God as a headset-wearing coach in the clouds.

The Double A Huntsville Stars hosted Pleasures Ladies Night (sponsored by a sex toy store) and the North-Central Alabama Girl Scouts sleepover at the same game last week.

Anyone else notice that the Blake-Griffin-smashing-through-cardboard-defenders ad for the video game Rage borrows a little too generously from a '90s Chris Farley--ESPN spot?

Chris Johnson's rap debut, Act on Deck, which samples, of all things, a phone's busy signal.

Man U fans attacked parked cars belonging to paparazzi who were following midfielder Ryan Giggs because of his alleged infidelity.

Shane Battier tweeted last week that he was trying to round up '90s band Color Me Badd to perform at a party.

If you give your pitchers Gatorade baths to celebrate not breaking the MLB mark for consecutive winless starts...you might be a Blue Jay.

Miami, home of 2 Live Crew and the U, and "the city that keeps the roof blazing." Or Miami, the city where Michael McDonald sings the national anthem at the NBA Finals. Pick one, Miami.

TMZ headline that will make you rethink the whole apocalypse passing thing: RON ARTEST—PEACEMAKER IN L.A. NIGHTCLUB ATTACK.

The enthralling buzz of 100 Japanese school kids all taking on an 11-man pro soccer team in last week's most enjoyable and gonzo web video.

The Seattle bar where pints of Widmer are priced based on Mariners third baseman Chone Figgins's pedestrian batting average.

You've heard of Boise State's Smurf Turf. Central Arkansas just installed Barf Turf.

Guerilla warfare on soccer fans' sense of taste: Everton unveiled a camouflage goalkeeper jersey.

Mike Tyson's barely audible singing cameo in The Hangover Part II, which veers straight past train wreck and into spaceship wreck territory.

How heated is the Michigan--Ohio State rivalry? Maize-and-blue vest in peace shirts were on sale one day after Jim Tressel's resignation.

The daily diary at Zenyatta.com, which purports to be written by the '10 Horse of the Year, suggesting that 7-year-old mares, like teen girls, LIKE TO WRITE IN ALL CAPS.

LOW

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DAMON HIGGINS/PALM BEACH POST/ZUMAPRESS.COM (CUBAN)

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EVERTONDIRECT.COM (CAMOUFLAGE)

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HARPER (TEBOW)

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KIRBY LEE/US PRESSWIRE (JOHNSON)

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GARY A. VASQUEZ/US PRESSWIRE (ARTEST)

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MARIO ANZUONI/REUTERS (TYSON)

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GARETH CATTERMOLE/GETTY IMAGES (PAPARAZZI)

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YOUTUBE.COM (SCHOOLKIDS, FARLEY)

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SPORTSCRACK.COM (T-SHIRT)

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GIANT RECORDS (COLOR ME BADD)

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MARK BLINCH/REUTERS (REYES)

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FACEBOOK.COM (TURF)

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JOHN W. MCDONOUGH (ZENYATTA)

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RONALD MARTINEZ/GETTY IMAGES (MCDONALD)

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