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Penalty Phase

Author:

LAST MONTH ESPN suspended on-air personality Bob Ryan for making disparaging remarks about ESPN NBA analyst Mark Jackson while appearing on Dan Le Batard's ESPN radio show. So how does Ryan's two-week time-out compare with other ESPN disciplinary acts? Match the perp with the crime and the time.

THE LINEUP

1

BILL SIMMONS

2

MAX BRETOS

3

TEDDY ATLAS

4

TONY KORNHEISER

5

KEITH OLBERMANN

6

DAN LE BATARD

THE INFRACTIONS

A.

Two weeks for calling Bristol, Conn., a godforsaken place

B.

Two weeks for commenting on Hannah Storm's wardrobe

C.

One week for arguing with a program director

D.

Thirty days for using "chink in the armor" while discussing Jeremy Lin's game

E.

Two days for renting a billboard to mock LeBron James

F.

Three weeks for criticizing Roger Goodell

ANSWER KEY:

1, F / 2, D / 3, C / 4, B / 5, A / 6, E

THEY SAID IT

"WELL, I SURE AS HELL DON'T WANT IT TO BE ME STANDING AT THE $2 WINDOW AT TURFWAY."

Pete Rose

Reds great, who was selected for the team's hall of fame on Jan. 19, when asked how he'd like to be depicted in a statue that will be placed outside Great American Ball Park.

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

While in New York to play the Nets, Thunder forward Steve Novak ordered a room-service latte at the Trump Soho, for which he was charged $20.67.

PHOTO

FOTOLIA.COM (TV)

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LEON BENNETT/GETTY IMAGES (SIMMONS)

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AMY E. PRICE/GETTY IMAGES FOR SXSW (BRETOS)

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FRANK FRANKLIN II/AP (ATLAS)

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JIM MONE/AP (KORNHEISER)

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TAYLOR HILL/FILMMAGIC (OLBERMANN)

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JOE FARAONI/ESPN IMAGES (LE BATARD)

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MARK LYONS/GETTY IMAGES (ROSE)

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TWITTER.COM (LATTE)