How Lo Can They Go

Minor league teams strike up the brand

FOLLOWING THE PATH of the Hartford Yard Goats, a Rockies Double A affiliate, and the Savannah (Ga.) Bananas, a Coastal Plain League team, minor league squads are adopting attention-getting names that lend themselves to zany, merchandise-friendly logos. This off-season has brought five new entries, ranked from best to worst.

[This article contains a table. Please see hardcopy of magazine or PDF.]

TEAM	MLB AFFILIATION	LEVEL	LOGO DESCRIPTION
FOND DU LAC DOCK SPIDERS	none	college summer	Hirsute arachnid with a body built for the game
FLORIDA FIRE FROGS	Braves	Class A	Fire-belching amphibian should be catching a fly
JACKSONVILLE JUMBO SHRIMP	Marlins	Double A	Angry crustacean is where oxymoronic meets moronic
BINGHAMTON RUMBLE PONIES	Mets	Double A	'Roided-up equine can't decide if it's batting or boxing
NEW ORLEANS BABY CAKES	Marlins	Triple A	Street-tough infant bearing teeth and crown

THEY SAID IT

"I HAVEN'T REALLY TALKED TO ANYBODY. I DO TALK TO MY WIFE ON OCCASION."

Mark Dantonio

Michigan State coach, when asked if he'd recently caught up with his former player Washington quarterback Kirk Cousins.

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

Two Hollywood producers are developing a film about the NBA star who ended Cleveland's title drought: Matthew Dellavedova.