"When I was in rookie ball, someone yelled at me, 'You need a steak sandwich!'"
—Marlins 2B Dee Gordon, who weighed 150 lbs. at the time
"I was on deck and this guy was with his girlfriend, and he was like, 'Brandon, you can't hit! You swing like your mama!' And he goes, 'You can't get around on a fastball! You have a slow bat! You can't get around on nothing!' And I turned around and I said, 'I bet I can get around on your girl!' And everybody in the section was laughing, and he didn't say nothing for the rest of the game. I end up getting a hit, and I'm looking at him, blowing kisses at his girl, and she's laughing. I turned that one around a little bit, I guess."
—Braves 2B Brandon Phillips
"I wear my pants quite high, and I've been called Steve Urkel a lot. I have a high belly button and long legs! People don't realize that!"
—Braves 1B Freddie Freeman
"The one they'd get on me with all the time was, 'Trim those sideburns!' from The Simpsons episode. It's everywhere! We went to Australia a few years back, and it was everywhere."
—Marlins manager Don Mattingly
"The funniest one I can remember is a fan calling me Turtle, like from Entourage, in San Francisco when I was with the Dodgers. It got in my head! I was on deck. 'Hey, Turtle!' I knew exactly what he was talking about, because it was one of my favorite shows, and then the actor lost a little bit of weight and I was like, Hey, he doesn't look too bad! I'll take it!"
—Blue Jays C Russell Martin