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DUELING ROLES

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The nationwide release last week of Battle of the Sexes, in which Emma Stone and Steve Carell convincingly portray tennis stars Billie Jean King and Bobby Riggs, suggests there are other iconic sports rivalries that Hollywood could re-create. Here's a casting call

PENGUINS CENTER SIDNEY CROSBY

(ANDY SAMBERG)

VS.

CAPITALS WINGER ALEX OVECHKIN

(CHRISTOPH WALTZ)

TOP-RANKED TENNIS PLAYER STEFFI GRAF

(LAURA DERN)

VS.

TOP-RANKED TENNIS PLAYER MONICA SELES

(MAGGIE GYLLENHAAL)

PATRIOTS QB TOM BRADY

(EWAN MCGREGOR)

VS.

NFL COMMISSIONER ROGER GOODELL

(DAMIAN LEWIS)

NBA LEGEND MICHAEL JORDAN

(MICHAEL B. JORDAN)

VS.

HIS HIGH SCHOOL COACH POP HERRING

(DON CHEADLE)

THEY SAID IT

"PLEASE BEAT THE WARRIORS FOR ME. PLEASE? I'M GOING TO BE WATCHING THAT GAME."

Enes Kanter

Former Thunder center, in a message to his old team after learning that he was part of a trade for Knicks forward Carmelo Anthony.

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

A Colorado Springs jogger has been defecating in neighbors' yards, and Charmin has offered a year's supply of toilet paper to the Mad Pooper if she turns herself in.